So, we have big news in the Bergeron household... we are pregnant! Baby Bergeron will arrive sometime around April 2, 2009. This new state in which I find myself, has been met with so many emotions, fears, and feelings of utter nausea! Taking the pregnancy test is a weird phenomenon. While you always know there is a possibility that you could be pregnant, you never really think it is going to happen. Then BANG, out of nowhere your life is changed by a double line. You don't look or feel different at first, and yet you can't help but feel like everything has changed. As you may expect, I had all of these emotions, accompanied by the stress of how this fits into residency and life as a doctor. While none of these things have been resolved, nor will they anytime soon, my fears have been met with a great deal of peace and grace. I have a bad habit of freaking out and trying to fix everything myself. This is a vicious match of arm wrestling between me and God, where I alway lose, and by his patience and grace He teaches me to trust him, and ultimately restores the joy in whatever the situation may be.
Lately the situation at hand has been morning sickness, and pretty much everything associated with being pregnant. I have found that it is really difficult to begin the bonding process with your child when the only indication that said child exists is the fact that you want to throw up your toenails pretty much every minute you are awake. With this attitude you might imagine that i was not feeling the blessings that children can be, but rather feeling sorry for myself. I had no idea the labor of love all of our mothers endure to bring us into the world and care for us for the rest of her life. I mean... we make our awfulness known from the get go. I have apologized to my mom on numerous occasions these past 9 weeks.
So on to what nobody tells you.... morning sickness is the worst thing ever... and "morning" is a most unfortunate misnomer. Morning sickness as some male obviously called it begins anytime your feet hit the floor, whether that is to go pee in the middle of the night, or just to get up and attempt to move on with your day. This feeling will last until you find a way to fall asleep at night. Holy Cow it is NO FUN. The feeling can best be described as either feeling so hungry that you are nauseated and no food seems good enough to put in your zipcode much less near your mouth.... or as a flu that lasts the better part of 6 weeks. The foods that you can choke down this week become absolutely repulsive next week, it is bizarre. Luckily after bearing the burden un-medicated for a couple of weeks, I have discovered phenergan... the best medicine ever, which has allowed me to resume a functional level of activity.
Stay tuned for more interesting adventures.
