siempregracia

Update, finally!

2011-03-03T09:03:00.005-06:00

Hello friends and family. We are still alive and kicking. Life is good. Somewhat crazy, but good! We have had a busy time the past few months. Jaclyn has been on a steady stream of ICU months the past few months, and chasing Lilly around has become more than a full time job! We have been blessed with some incredible support which makes this crazy journey so fun. After some gentle ribbing from some good friends (you know who you are), I will try to post a little more often. I realize nobody really cares about what I say, most of you just want to see pictures of Lilly, so here they are. As you can see, she is growing up so fast! She amazes us every single day. The latest trick, she bust out into a full rendition of "Old B. Donnel" yesterday, somehow the only real animal he has is a cow...every now and then a pig finds its way into the mix. I've been trying to capture this on video, but whenever I bust out the camera, she stops singing and says, "I see Lilly!" Here are some pictures from last week taken with some good friends, the Sommervilles!

Lilly and Caroline reading books together

November already?? and Halloween

2010-11-02T09:51:00.007-05:00

First of all, Happy BIRTHDAY to my (blake) mom. Today is "Grammy's" birthday! We are all so grateful for her and hope she has the best birthday ever.

Halloween was 2 days ago and there was a saga. Initally, Jaclyn found Lilly a Lion outfit, complete with mane! It was very cute, but this is what happened whenever we put the mane on her.

As you can see...not a happy camper. Nonetheless a very effective lion roar, I think. Whenever we would ask her if she wanted to be a lion, she would demonstratively say, "NO!" Then Jaclyn spent at least 3 hours of her off day making her a bumble bee costume because we would ask Lilly if she wanted to be a bumble-bee and she would nod, "YES!" So, Jac made a wonderful costume of yellow and black lacy material but whenever she approached Lilly with it, she would cry and run away! Didn't even let us hold it up to her so that Jac could fit it. So needless to say we were running out of ideas. My mom had given us Kera's old puppy pj's, so we asked lilly if she wanted to be a puppy, and she said, "Uh huh." So we put her in the suit. She must hate things on her head...because this is the only picture I got with her keeping the ears on.

Then we went to trick or treat...made it to only 2 houses. Whenever anyone gave her candy, she would just wail whenever we made her put it in her bag. As long as she had one piece in each hand she was good to go.Then we had a neighborhood get together with all of the other families on our block, had pizza, homemade cupcakes, and Lilly got to bounce in the moon bounce with the other children and learned a new feat! More on this later. Have a great week everyone!

Lilly is 18 months!!

2010-10-04T20:55:00.003-05:00

My how time flies! 18 months...doesn't even really seem possible really. Lilly is growing up so fast. Growing more and more every day, talking up a storm, counting to 3 all by herself, and is generally fearless about all of life! So fun! Here are some pictures that I (Blake) took on her 18th month birthday...I had a great time making these

"Lilly, show me your teeth!"

"Surprise Face"

Daddy & Daughter Surprise Faces!!!

Much to say

2010-08-17T09:56:00.003-05:00

So, since the last post, a whole lot has happened in the Bergeron household. I (Blake) graduated residency and have started my new job in the real world, which is incredible. Jaclyn has started her 2nd year, and while in some ways it is better than intern year, in some ways it is worse. Lilly continues to grow and absolutely amaze us. Her new favorite thing is giving kisses...to mommy, to daddy, to stuffed animals, and yes, even to her friends (much to the chagrin of her father). She is so sweet and growing up so fast. I took this video at story time the other day...sorry it's sideways (still trying to master the iphone video taking), but this was spontaneous hand holding between Lilly and her good friend Will Bowman.

Proud Son!!

2010-05-14T01:53:00.002-05:00

It's about 2 am on Friday, May 14th, 2010, I just finished a shift in the non-acute ED at LeBonheur, and in a few short hours my dad will walk out of the fire station for the last time as a member of the Nashville Fire Department, a department he has served for 34 years! Mom and I talked about what a bittersweet time this is for us a family because the fire department is more than just a job, it is a brotherhood. I basically grew up in a fire hall, climbing on the trucks, getting to blow the horn, going to work with dad and getting McDonalds on the ride into work. The job required other lifestyle changes for all of us: getting up on Christmas day at 4am to open presents before Dad had to go to work; missing him every 3rd night growing up as he would work 24 hour shifts; worrying at night knowing that he would be in the middle of any fire that may break out. Growing up, I always thought of what he did as simply a job, something he did to provide for us at home.

This past week, I realized just how much more firefighting was. Last Saturday, the guys on Dad's shift threw him a retirement party, and for the first time, really, I got to see and hear what Dad was like to those around him at work. I heard story after story of my dad's work ethic, of his ability to take control of a dangerous situation and save those who worked for him, of the respect he earned from his colleagues. I knew all of these things conceptually, but I had never heard them first hand. Man after man came up to me telling me of the caliber of man that my dad was, how much they enjoyed working for/with him, and told me how much they respected him. It was incredible to be there, to see this part of his life, and see how much he was respected and loved by his brothers.

So now, in a few hours, dad leaves one family to join another. When he walks out of the doors of that fire hall for the last time, no doubt he deserves an ovation, lines of people on either side wishing him the best. That is not how firefighters roll, however. In all likelihood, there will be no fanfare, there will be no streamers, no ticker tape. Probably the shift will change, new men will come to work ready to be called to every car wreck, to every 911 call for help, to help a city recover from the flood. He will walk to his car, drive home tired after another night on call. In a few short weeks, Dad will take over as the head chief of the Columbia, TN fire department.

He will carry all of his experiences from Nashville and lead Columbia with the same intensity and fire that has led him thus far. I am so proud of all that Dad has accomplished thus far, and all that he will attain in the future! Thank a firefighter today for all they do!

Lilly rides!

2010-05-05T21:31:00.001-05:00

Lilly Walks for Real

2010-04-28T20:29:00.002-05:00

Hello! Here's Lilly's latest video...She has turned into quite the little walker, taking several steps in a row now. She still won't stand up by herself just yet, but we think she is getting ready to take off! Enjoy!

LILLY WALKS (or at least takes an independent step)

2010-04-17T00:24:00.004-05:00

So this was shot with my iphone, so sorry for the poor quality, but this was literally taken minutes after her 1st ever independent steps on April 14th! We have much more to update but I wanted to post this video for everyone to see!

Lilly celebrates 11mos with a Memphis Staple

2010-03-04T21:15:00.003-06:00

Lilly recently turned 11 months old, man how time flies. Grandma RuthAnn was here for the week, and partially to celebrate another month-a-versary for Lilly, and partially because RuthAnn (and the rest of us) love GUS'S FRIED CHICKEN, we decided to take a little trip. I think it truly is the best Fried Chicken in the world, no kidding. So, for her birthday, we let Lilly have a chicken bone with just a little bit of the chicken and spices on it, and just took a ton of pictures. Needless to say, she LOVED it, just like the rest of us!! Enjoy, because we sure did!

Here and Now

2010-02-03T21:09:00.004-06:00

I'm not sure why this has been on my heart lately. It may be the fact that the end of residency is quickly approaching for me (Blake), that one of my (and Jaclyn's) best friends in the entire world (and his quickly growing family) is considering leaving in a year to pursue fellowship, or that Lilly is growing up so fast, but God has really been challenging me to cherish today. So many times I get worried, anxious and sometimes overwhelmed about what is coming up in the future, be it months, or even years from today. I feel that somehow if I could just get through today, then I would be one step closer to my goals. Then at the end of the day, I lay down knowing deeply in my heart that I have wasted that day simply going through the motions. I long to cherish the time that I have been given. I know that no day is guaranteed, and I have seen this personally multiple times in my line of work. How many parents would love to have just one more day with their child who died from cancer or who was taken from them in a horrible car wreck?

When Jaclyn and I are honest, we long for the "future" when residency is over, when work settles down, and we can just spend time as a family. There is a peace in knowing that this day will hopefully come one day, but at the same time, we don't think about what that wishes away. There are no gifts from God greater than our next breath, our next morning, our next day at work. With that morn, come opportunities to serve others at the hospital, to love Lilly and watch her grow day by day, and to grow as a child of God. What I hope and pray is that I will live each day with this realization. God has my future already planned; HE has done the work; HE is in control. So, despite what circumstances God manipulates in my path (whether they be great triumphs or what I see as major failures), I just HAVE to trust that HE knows what is best. This is the only thing that offers me the freedom to enjoy the present.

Ok, here's another picture of Lilly taken this weekend. Grammy came down and help her discover computers! We love all of you!

2 teeth!!

2010-01-24T20:39:00.004-06:00

Hey! Just wanted to post a few pictures of Lilly from the last few weeks. Lilly thinks she is a big girl now that she has 2 whole teeth. She tries to use them to eat her goldfish, but not to much avail.

Merry Christmas... on New Year's Eve...

2009-12-31T23:43:00.006-06:00

She actually smiled for the first several pics, but Blake was not quick enough to the draw to get those on our camera!

Here is LIlly in her rocking chair... a graduation present from Sarah Koontz, our Christmas tree is in the background... and Grammy made both the dress above and this one. "Man am I a lucky girl."

Merry first Christmas from the home of the ever-crazy Bergeron family. Blake and I had the pleasure of working over the holiday, which prompted him to comment... "do you think we will be a family again soon?" All that being said, we were blessed to have Blake's family join us to celebrate/watch Lilly while we worked. Blake was in the NICU and I have been working nights in the ED.

Blake and I at Dr. Bugnitz the Peds program director, and LIlly is ready for Christmas Eve service. Check out her ever so stylish red shoes.

We could have never made it, nor would our holidays have been so wonderful without the help of his family. Nonnie, Poppaw, Grammy, Grandfather, and Kera came to Memphis for the occasion. We somehow managed to scramble together Christmas gifts at the last minute, and clean the house enough for company. Consequently the only presents bought prior to Christmas were the ones of the family we had to face :).

Lilly in the tub with Aunt Teresa's toys at good work, and another shot of Christmas eve.

Here WE are trying to get her to open her presents.... and SHE is trying to get the ribons and paper out of the garbage which have already been unwrapped. TYPICAL!

If you are one of our family members/friends wondering where your gift might be now that we both have jobs... Be patient, and stop being so greedy, that is not what CHristmas is about.. hee hee. Here are some pics to whet your appetite while you anxiously await me getting my act together and sending out our holiday/2010 greetings.

Stephen Choate came to meet Lilly for the first time, and Snickers is being a good sport.

Sporting the full baby's first christmas outfit. The hats don't last that long these days. Here she sits... fully recovered... in one of Godmother Greta's generous gifts.

Lilly CRAWLS

2009-12-29T13:17:00.004-06:00

Hi everyone! At last, Jaclyn and I have a little time on our hands, so we have decided that we are going to do a rush of blog posts, at least one every other day for the next 6 days, PROMISE! We will update 1st Christmas among other things.

BUT, today is Lilly's 9 month birthday (man, where does the time go?), and she has finally learned to crawl, albeit in a half army crawl/half sitting manner. Enjoy this video (sorry it's sideways, we haven't upgraded to new software to be able to rotate the video yet.)

Happy Thanksgiving x 2 one month late

2009-11-26T18:28:00.009-06:00

November has been a most welcomed respite for the Bergeron Family. I have been on a rotation in the ED which has allowed me time to spend out of the hospital and regain a sense of normalcy. Blake has been on a rotation in Cardiology which only requires him to have 4 half days of clinic per week. It is amazing that even though I am working significantly less than I have the past four months, I am jealous of how much of a slacker Blake can be :) I suppose that is something for me to look forward to.

The first sign that things were looking up was a most welcomed surprise visit from one of my best friends from college. Mary and Adam McCulloch and their dear daugthers Katie and Caroline (who is 7 days younger than Lilly) came to visit overnight. I was so happy I cried! (not unusual these days... I must say I am looking forward to regaining my hard skin, although I fear I may never achieve that) We had a wonderful time catching up and letting the girls get to know their soon to be, God willing, best pen pal friends!

One of the other bright spots in this past month was our trip home to Virginia to spend time with my family. Although trips home are always busy, because they happen so rarely, they are always rich in joy. We visited my granddaddy wampler who had never met Lilly. I think he was suprised at how big she was. We also spent time with Grandma, her friends and MaMa. Of course Tara and MOm and Dad got in on the Lilly loving. Uncle Sean and Kyle's family were deeply missed. During that stay all the cousins got together for an early Thanksgiving. Second to Easter, Thanksgiving is my FAVORITE. We have always had a rich time of fellowship and laughs in the family... this year was no different, and when you don't think you will have the opporutnity to share this, and then you can, it makes it that much sweeter.

Today... real Thanksgiving, has also held a first in the Bergeron house. Blake and I, well mostly Blake, but I helped, made our first turkey and hosted our first thanksgiving. Our Nashville family came down to celebrate with Lilly (an us) as I had to work.. in fact am working right now... hard as you can tell. We bought the turkey, stuffed it with lemons, onions, celery and garlic, and rubbed it up. We then put it in the set it and forget it Ronco rotisserie. Let me tell ya, this bird was the best we have ever had! It was amazing. I will never do a turkey another way. Growing up I had always wanted a large golden, crispy bird as the centerpiece of a thanksgiving table. When you have 40 people to feed ( a norm for us as a kid) that does not happen. This year... it was like a magazine. This thing was gorgeous. Of course Nonnie was on hand to provide the fixins. Man were they good.

A taste of things to come... Great grandma gives us our first gift.

October is finally over

2009-11-04T10:06:00.007-06:00

I have had several comments about the brief stall in blog posts from some faithful readers. Well, October has been our most difficult month. It has been all we could do to see each other, spend time with Lilly, not quit residency, and just survive. You know how some people tell you to just take it a day at a time, well, this month I found myself shortening that and trying to make it half way to lunch before I needed to re-pep-talk myself. Blake and I were both on wards in the pediatric hospital. For me, it was something new and incredibly busy, for him, the same old junk, but with an unhappy wife, who at times was emotionally unstable. We had the great misfortune of being on call back to back. What this means for my non-medical friends is, I would have a 30 hour shift where he would be alone with Lilly. After not sleeping for 30 hours, I would come home, during which time his 30 hour shift would have begun. I would sleep for about 2.5 hours or 3, and have to get Lilly from day care. 3 hours being quite insufficient, I would then be on my own with her all night, trying my best to be exciting mommy, not dead dog tired mommy. Then we would get up and take her in the next day at 630am, and I would start another 9-11 hr shift. Blake would be finishing his 30 hours and then come home and crash. So for a solid half the week he and I were either working or sleeping. Throw a 7 month old in the mix and you have the recipe for low morale in the bergeron house. Whew... that was tough to relive through typing! All that being said, it is a new day! I am now doing shifts int he ED, only 15 for the month, I am going home in a week, the first time since lilly was born, And blake basically works 3 half days and 2 full days a week with no weekends. Grace abounds, just when you need it most.

Now that you are privy to the type of month we just survived, you can appreciate why lilly's 7 month pics are in her high chair and not a better locale. :) She is still super cute, and super huge! Please appreciate the barrette progression.

October also brought our first Halloween. We were a pumpkin, very original, I know, but I wanted to make the costume, since made ones are much better, but once again refer to the top of the blog tirade... thus we were a pumpkin because it was the cutest Babies R Us had to offer, and I refused to make her a whoopie cushion much to Blake's chagrin. Malinda and Anju were in tow for Zoo-Boo. On actual Halloween night I had the privilege of being on call, so Lilly graciously reverse-trick-or-treated to the hospital to bring the team candy!

Last but not least the one great thing that came out of October was the visit from Anju and Malinda, my two best friends from medical school. They now live in Cincinnati and Minnesota respectively. BOO. Here we are at our favorite restaurant, and the gorgeous wedding of two dear friends.

6 months of pictures (more than you bargained for on this one!)

2009-09-29T19:21:00.003-05:00

Wow, I just realized that it has almost been a months since my last post. I have been in the adult ICU for the past rotation, and have really enjoyed it, however, it has not lent itself to much time for blogging. It has been very challenging, and very fulfilling. The hardest part has been the crazy hours I have had to work. I have cherished every minute I have had outside of the hospital. Lilly has grown so much in the past few weeks. This is and forever will be the hardest part, but I know deep down when I really think about things that I am doing what I have been called to do.

Lilly is six months old today... wow how sweet it has been. She is soooo funny. She has learned to grin, more than her surprised smile- if only I could learn to capture it on film. She can sit all by her self. When I picked her up from day care the other day, her teacher said that she had dumped all the toys out of the bucket and was running the show, handing them out to other kids. I suppose I am raising the alpha dog. I have no idea where she got such a personality! She loves paper... today, for her month-a-versary, I let her do what she always wants to do, play with the junk mail.... she had a BLAST. She loves her exer-saucer, she is so good. She hardly ever cries, and just rolls with the flow. She loves to play, take baths, and now... I am happy to report that in the month in which it was most important for her to sleep, she has slept through the night since about 1 week into the month. What a wonderful little girl, bless her heart!

Here we are at zero days/months/years

One month

Two month birthday she shared with another event. And she got her first shots :(

THe real three month birthday she was sick, as evidenced by the car seat picture. She started to hold toys, and still loved the swing

Four months she was smiling and playing. Grammy made this great smoked masterpiece

Five months and she was sitting alone. What a big girl!

Here are some more pictures from the fifth month which have been neglected until now. Some have already been seen.

Here you see her first swinging expedition, and yet another beautiful smocked dress. She is the best dressed kid on the block.

Sometimes you just have to watch her sleep... how could you not.

as you might imagine, daddy is wrapped around that little finger, and thanks to aunt andrea, she is learning her letters! She can spin it all by herself.

Here we are.... Six months!

In other, less exciting news, I turned 29, which is almost 30 for those of you not so savvy with your counting. Blake's mom and nonnie came down and threw me a party post call, complete with tinkerbell tiaras... there is no better way to turn 29 than with tinkerbell tiaras and soul food... like chicken pot pie and macaroni and cheese :)

On my real birthday, my friend Cindy and I went to eat sushi. Since I had my birthday on a Monday, my traditional Bahn Thai was out, and I wanted to wait on Boscos! Man am I a creature of habit or what.

friends visit, will turns 1 and look how cute I am

2009-09-05T19:38:00.007-05:00

Somehow amidst all the craziness, we have still managed to stay somewhat social. That is not to say really social, since all of my friends are most likely still awaiting return phone calls. I started my ICU rotation last week. I used to like the ICU. It is amazing how much this sweet little girl makes my main goal of the day to get home, not start central lines. To my friends, please know that I am not ignoring just you... i am ignoring everyone. Since starting work, I have really struggled with why am I working and is it worth it. This translates into a lot of uncertainty and a lot of hard days. Usually after those days, I just want to come home and be absorbed in the life of Lilly and Blake. I only have a limited amount of time with them lately so I try not to be on the phone. I still really love you all. I am so sorry, I will emerge from my hermit/borderline depressed state soon (I hope). Or I will quit and emerge indefinitely. Just needed to make my disclaimer. Now for the pics. The reason everyone checks this blog. I am a realist!

Geoff and Ashley Watson were in town for David Holt's wedding. We had a great time at the wedding and the following day they came over with Greer. Greer and Lilly were born about 6 days apart. As you can see they are instant friends, though Lilly has not yet learned that when you are sharing your mat, you cannot roll over your friend.

Will Boman turned 1 year old on 9/4. Today was his birthday. We had a great time watching him eat his cake and run his party. The Bowmans had a swimming pool, ball pit, and a baby moon bounce. While Lilly did not partake, it was fun to watch others. Conner and Caroline, Ryan and Harper were also in tow.

In the meantime we managed to get some great pics in her cute cupcake outfit. I think I will try to be a photographer. Maybe then I can pay back my loans and not do residency! Although I don't think I would like taking pictures of other people as much as I like taking pics of her. Enjoy her cuteness... we sure do!

In other news... Lilly learned how to actually bounce in her jumper instead of just spinning around.

Lilly learns some new tricks at 5 months

2009-08-30T15:29:00.005-05:00

Here is some documentation of Lilly's last few days. She is becoming a reliable sitter. She is also gaining more and more rolls! She has been so much fun. I think month 4-5 is my favorite. It has been sooooo much fun. She still does not sleep through the night. I know it is most likely my fault, but unfortunately since I never get to see her, I just get up and get her when she cries because I like to hold her. Well enough jabber, here she is...

Here she demonstrating how adept she is at posing for the camera and rolling over :)

My big girl no longer needs her carseat adapter to go trotting!

this, my friends, is quite possibly the best baby toy ever. The exer-saucer is BRILLIANT

And now for the big tricks...Lilly can sit! I can't even believe it!

Thanks Grammy for this sweet dress!

Thanks Grandma Ruth Ann for bringing me this awesome outfit from the Big Easy! Not every girl can have a biker grandma who loves her so much~

Lilly SWIMS!

2009-08-22T22:09:00.005-05:00

Today was Tucker Chipman's 1st Birthday Party...A pool party. We thought we would take Lilly for her 1st swim. Loaded down with her swim suit that Grammy bought her, we took the plunge. As soon as we lowered her into the water, we could tell by her face that it wasn't going to be a great experience. Jaclyn quickly ran to get the camera, b/c we knew this fun wasn't going to last long. Here's all we got! The video isn't 5 minutes long this time...only 39 seconds.It didn't start out so bad...

But quickly got out of hand!

Lilly eats cereal!

2009-08-17T08:56:00.001-05:00

I know we are way behind blog posting...i still have to talk about the end of vacation, father's day, etc...but we just shot this video of Lilly eating rice cereal for the first time! It's so cute! It was too big to upload straight here, so I'll uploaded it to YouTube and had to embed it here. So fun. It's amazing how fast they grow up!

Four months

2009-07-30T17:27:00.005-05:00

My apologies for the lack of pictures and posts over the past month. It has been nuts. I will not muse about this past month at this time, since this is meant to be a happy, light and fluffy post. Lilly celebrated 1/3 a year on earth with 2days of fevers! Luckily she perked up enough to pose for her portrait. Check out the dress that Grammy (Blake's mom) smocked. She is AWESOME!

The past month has been one of the most fun months of Lilly's short existence. She started to smile, giggle, screach, and play. She has rolled over from back to front and front to back... ONCE. She now just screams when we try to make her do it again, and without fail, Blake rescues her. No wonder she won't roll over, daddy does it for her :) She plays with her lion and monkey and various other weird animals on the mat my friends Anju and Carol Sue gave her (miss you guys).

She holds her tongue out to catch water in the bathtub the way you or I might try to catch snow. She has definitely learned to prefer her parents if given the option.

As far as sleeping goes, she gets a big fat F. She rarely sleeps more than 3 hours, and even that has become more rare. As you might imagine, this is an unwelcomed habit given the 2 times a week both blake and I pull 30 hour shifts. But we love her nonetheless. Hopefully she will grow out of it before my eyes have permanent circles under them.

It has been the best 4 months ever. I love being a mom, and every day is richer. She is so curious, and it is amazing to watch her discover the world. I used to wish that she would stay little and cuddly so I could always hold and protect her. I thought it would be so sad to watch her grow, but it is just the opposite. Sure I am aware of the passage of time, and how each minute is only here once. (more on that later... therein lies my problem with residency) But what a great joy it is to watch her grow and develop, to smile, and coo. I love my life! I am so blessed. Happy 4 months.

Beach Vacation - Installment #1

2009-07-05T11:06:00.009-05:00

All the cousins at the beach. (I didn't get the jeans memo?!?)

Hey! Sorry it's been a while. We have had a CRAZY few weeks with a vacation, father's day, start of Jaclyn's orientation/residency, me on extra call followed by 3 nights in the ED...all combined with a pumpkin who has decided that sleep is for the birds.

Personal note: please pray for our household. While we are in a very large transition with adjusting to life with Lilly, Jaclyn starting residency, juggling terrible upper level residents and attendings, things are stressful to say the least. Jac and I are doing great with our marriage (it helps when you marry a stud that is the best mom and the best doctor I have ever been around), but b/c of my schedule this month, Jac and I have literally only seen each other for a few HOURS! We are each spending quality time with Lilly too, but that sometimes means sacrificing time with each other. It's tough to say the least, so pray for supernatural strength, wisdom as we are praying about what we should be doing and what life should look like, and thank for all the encouragement. Not to mention that I started running a fever last pm, cough, body aches, etc...so add to all of this an illness that I may well give to both Jac and Lilly!! Yikes! We couldn't make it without God's Grace and all of your love!

Lilly's cute beach hat! (Thanks Cousin Sherry!)
Ladybug outfit

Jaclyn graduated (YAY!), then shortly thereafter we headed to the Outer Banks, NC (or OBX) with Jaclyn's whole family for a week there. There were at least 20 people there the entire time: Jac's 3 aunts, all of her cousins and their families in tow. We had a great time, relaxing on the beach, going for short jogs, and watching Lilly meet her cousins and aunts. Like most great vacations, not too much to report, lots of rest, good food, fun stories, and whenever the crew gets together, tons of laughing. We took Lilly to the beach one day for pictures, but we didn't want to expose her to direct sunlight before 6 months of age (as per AAP guidelines), so she visited once and got to take lots and lots of baths with Grandma RuthAnn. More stories to follow, we did take one day trip as a family. More to come later. Here are some picture highlights:

Family on the beach in Nags Head, NC.

More adventures to follow...including a disaster poop story (Aunt Tara we need the pictures!)

This is crazy~

2009-06-08T08:11:00.004-05:00

DISCLAIMER- This is not an attempt for pity comments :) Merely and observation that I find funny... I am just jealous that Blake is funnier!

It is disturbing to me that Blake's post about me not kissing him got more comments than the fact that Lilly turned 2 months and I graduated from medical school.... I mean really. I suppose this is similar to that saying in order to have a friend you have to be a friend. So I suppose in order to have comments you have to comment on others. Oh well... I guess I will begin commenting because I so enjoy when others comment. Really?!?!?! only 2 comments for graduation?!?!?

Just kidding. To set the record straight, what Blake did not tell you, he was trying to kiss me in a rocking chair and I was seriously convinced I was going to end up on the concrete with a busted head... hence the hesitation to feel overly romantic!

Jaclyn Hates me

2009-06-06T00:01:00.004-05:00

It's blake. it's almost midnight on Friday, June 5th, 2009 and I just wanted to say that for whatever reason, Jaclyn doesn't like me anymore. We were sitting by the fire out back and when I went to kiss her, she put both hands up and totally pulled her face away. We were even having a great conversation! Whatever...So, for the record, she doesn't like me and we are fighting. I Cor says that, "love is patient, love is kind...and love is always kissing your husband back when he wants to kiss you." See, baby, even the bible says so! Oh well. Here is a picture of Lilly. She is asleep in her swing right now. In this picture, she is in a pretty yellow dress and looking GREAT!!

UPDATE:: Now it's around 10am on Saturday morning, and we are not fighting anymore. Everything was fine, and Jaclyn even let me kiss her a few minutes after I made the blog post. Just wanted to set the record straight . In other good news, Lilly went about 7 hours between feedings last night, so now we know she definitely can do it! OK, happy saturday!

Lilly shares her two month birthday!

2009-06-01T00:29:00.006-05:00

Can you believe it? I am finally finished! One can only wear this T-shirt and it be funny on the day they graduate from medical school!

Two month picture :)

Sweet Girl... 2 months of blessings!

Cousin MacKenzie was very curious about "Baby Lilly" What a great helper!

On May 29, 2009 Lilly turned 2 months old. I must say she has become quite the popular little member of the family. In the last month she has taken a trip to NC, had tons of visitors, smiled, and started sleeping through most of the night. (actually check that, since I started writing this post, she has regressed) She is soooooo stinking cute, and we can't believe how quickly two months have passed. She even survived her first shots. Unfortunately, or fortunately as the case may be, I don't have any profound thoughts as I am too sleep deprived currently to string a sentence together on the first try, much less comment from the depths of my soul. I will say that I still think she is the best thing EVER.

See Band-Aid evidence of the assult!

On that same day, I became a doctor. Scary I know, given my current state of insanity(see reason mentioned above). I really can't believe I have finally finished my education. I think someone needs to lock me in a room with the assignment to write... My name is Jaclyn Bergeron and I am a doctor... about a million times. Perhaps by the time I emerge it will feel real.

Check it out... it is for real... my name really is on it!
Here is my first attempt at juggling my two lives... mom and doctor

This was the first time both of my brothers had met Lilly. Here you see Aunt Tara and Uncle Sean loving on her and me :) I am so glad they were there.

Now comes the real challenge, finding clothes that will accommodate the changes nursing and pregnancy have caused. Blake has found me in my bathroom on more than one occasion with my white coat on thinking... hmmmm can I pull this off, or do I need to just give up and go for the T-shirt that I know fits! The days after pregnancy pose issues when it comes to wardrobe. On the one hand you now look much thinner in the maternity clothes, on the other, if you have to wear them one more day you might scream. I don't know if I am the only one this happens to, but I cannot stand how the elastic in the maternity pants gets all twisted around. Can't they make things a little better! Oh well, eventually I will have my clothes back.

A Holy Groan

2009-05-27T22:55:00.004-05:00

Hello...It's Blake. I'm not sure this whole fatherhood thing has really hit me yet...i'm not sure it will any time soon. Right now with Lilly it's a lot of precious holding, feeding, burping, not so precious poopy diaper changes, etc. Somehow in the midst of all of this, God finds ways to teach me about aspects of himself, about his character, and about his word. They pop up at random, sometimes during the hectic moments and sometimes in the quiet times. I have been humbled over the past 8 weeks by God's revelations.

Take this example. Lilly has really turned into a huge grunter/groaner...no, not the respiratory distress/autoPEEP type of grunting (shout out to all my colleagues) but simply a gutteral, back of the throat vocalization that emerges at different times. I think she get's it from me because I recognize this sound coming from myself with 2am calls from nurses asking for an inpatient order, or from obese people who won't walk down a single flight of stairs and so make the elevator stop at every floor on the way down...I digress. Seriously, it is a cute sound that she makes whenever she is uncomfortable, is getting hot or cold, or just wants some attention (aka, somebody to hold her). After a few minutes of these groans, she will get really serious and just start wailing (see obligatory blog picture post below!) I started thinking about these grunts and it reminded me of Romans 8:26, "We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express."

This was not-so-much a groan as a full blown scream...How cute are her bunny slippers?!?

Lilly knows when she needs something from me. Although she cannot express these needs yet with words, her groans do the job. In the same way, I know that with all things fatherhood and life, I struggle to know what to pray for. Especially when I consider my daughter and all things surrounding her, I get overwhelmed. Her physical safety, her emotional needs, her self esteem, how to respond when other kids are mean to her (jaclyn told me that physical harm is both non-christian and illegal..shame), how to show her God's Love, not to mention all the things that I haven't even thought about yet. It is good to know that the Holy Spirit knows all these things, that the Spirit takes over and that with a groan, an intensely emotional cry for help, presents them to the Father.

That is when God really gives me an insight into Himself. When Lilly starts her groans, all I want to do is to make them stop, to let her know that I am here and to show her that all is well. I will literally do anything in my power to help her. I know that our Heavenly Father is the same way. One prayer as Jaclyn and I continue this journey that is parenthood is that God would continue to teach us in ways such as this.

I must have been NUTS! (Beware a massive post, but Lilly smiles at the end)

2009-05-20T22:17:00.014-05:00

Following our retarded decision to listen to James Taylor in the rain, we embarked on what was to become the single most "un-restful" vacation I have ever had. This is not to say that it was not super fun, I just have not been on a vacation with a 6-7 week old before, and it is way more stressful than you might expect. Or perhaps I had been just hopefully optimistic and it was just as stressful as you might imagine. I have never nursed in so many unconventional, and somewhat uncomfortable settings, one of which involved a car ride from the Biltmore house to the wedding site of a one Miss Robyn Blanton following pictures that went a little over and a Lilly meltdown, see pic below...

It all began on Wednesday the 6th of May. I have two best friends from college, Robyn and Mary. Well Robyn was getting married in Asheville, NC at the Biltmore on May 9th, a date set prior to the twinkle of Lilly. I had bought the bridesmaid dress in my size before finding out I was pregnant. I then returned it and bought it one size up which I thought was the biggest they had. After realizing that this did not fit at about week 10 of pregnancy I had little hope the dress would fit one month post-partum, so I returned it, destined to screw up all pictures with my non-uniform look. This winter when I was becoming more round by the second, J.Crew in their infinite wisdom, knowing the stress of screwing up the pictures for the wedding of a lifetime, came out with a bigger size. Ok... I digress. Anyway, Wednesday after picking up the dress from last minute reconstructions at the best seamstress in the world's house, we were off to Nashville to break up the trip. We are unable to get to Nashville without stopping at least once to feed Lilly, this day was no different. We spent the night in Nashville and then proceeded to Knoxville where we met my best friend from med school, Malinda. Malinda grew up on a massive dairy farm, and she and I felt like we needed to rub Lilly on the baby cows in decrease the likelihood of her being plagued by allergies. While we heeded Blake's concern and did not rub her on the cows, she did get a baby cow kiss!

Me, Malinda and Lilly with the baby calves
Lilly's Jersey Kiss

After spending the afternoon in Knoxville, it was off to Asheville to introduce Lilly to Robyn before the festivities. They were instant friends. For most of the weekend she was an absolute angel. In, fact people thought she never cried. She definitely debunked that theory during the formal pictures. Mom arrived Friday to watch Lilly during the wedding so Blake and I could dance the night away. I have never tried to get myself ready as well as keeping up with the feeding schedule of an infant and keep myself and her clean prior to massive pictures and keep her away from the bride so that she did not spit up on something important. For the most part she was good, but towards the end... you know the most important part, it got dicey. I had to feed her and get myself dressed and calm her down all during pictures... DISASTER. Robyn was gracious, but I felt terrible. The picture experience escalated as we went to different places on the estate to take pics. I chose to stay with Robyn to fulfill my matron of honor duties, and Blake had a go with Lilly. Needless to say things went haywire when pictures went past feeding time.

Daddy/daughter bonding (still in the clear)Our attempt at a family portrait before the meltdown
Blake's attempt at artistry. Not half bad.
A quite comical moment when a bird pooped on both Robyn and DG simultaneously. I graciously gave her a spit bath, given our limited resources.

This begins to represent how Lilly felt about the whole ordeal!
And this pretty much wraps it up in a nutshell.

All that being said, the wedding was amazing. I will definitely post about it later, but check out how HOT Robyn looks! Not to take away from how sad Lilly appears!

Robyn in route to meet DG in the gardens... doesn't she look beautiful!
I should be so lucky to count her among my best friends. It is a joy to walk through life with her. Done and done... she is a married woman.

Following the wedding we had a meaningful brunch with Mom for mother's day in the hotel lobby, at her request. I was planning something much more special but she needed to hit the road.
She spent half of breakfast talking with other guests... that's my mom! Here Blake is saying "Happy Mother's Day Ruth Ann, glad I could fix you a waffle."
Lilly has the great fortune of seeing both her grandmas for Mother's day.

We contemplated visiting the estate as tourist but after seeing the line to go in, hit the road for the second part of our marathon trip... Gatlinburg, TN with the Bergerons.

words cannot express how much I love the mountains. I will move back there one day!

It was great to be able to see all the moms on mother's day. Something that I am sure will not happen every year, and was particularly meaningful since they are now grandmothers.

All of the sudden Nonnie doesn't mind having her picture made! Let's hear it for 4 generations!
Part of my requested activities were shopping at the outlets and visiting the Aquarium. I got to pet a sting ray, and almost got eaten by a shark...

While in the mountains we were able to take a little hike, and Lilly saw her first waterfall. She was in excellent shape and was not even out of breath. I on the other hand was reminded how much she hurt my back when I was pregnant!

Here we stroll.
We made it!
Possible Christmas card preview!

After being gone for just at 1 week, we finally returned home and began the process of teaching Lilly to sleep in her own bed. It is now 5/22 and we are still trying to get her to take naps, but whatever!

In other news, we saw her smile for sure on May 15th. It is so great, she now smiles all the time, well at least whenever we change her diaper.

Carolina in my mind...

2009-05-16T17:16:00.008-05:00

A temporary lack of judgment resulted in Blake and I attending my second ever James Taylor concert. You might say I have come full circle, as my first concert was after I graduated from high school 10 years ago, and now on the brink of graduating from medical school I had the opportunity to enjoy his acoustic mastery once again. James Taylor came to Memphis in May Beale Street Music Festival making it the cheapest ticket you could hope for to see him. This would be well and fine if it did not rain every year... a mess so large that the locals of Memphis ( I suppose that would include me at this point) call it the Beale Street Mud Fest, and rarely to we make the mistake of buying a three day pass because it ineveitably rains 2 of 3 days. This year was no different, but with Grammy in town to watch lilly, there was no way I was going to miss my man, rain or shine. and RAIN it did.

Here we are prepared... or so we thought...

It was a HUGE mess. In fact James even called us out of our minds... happily out of our minds I would argue. Luckily I am into outdoor gear so I had little problem. Though not pictured here, I acutally had on rain pants as well. I remained mostly dry throughout. Blake on the other hand did not fare as well in his crocks!

and this isn't even the worst spot!
I forgot to mention that snoop dog was also there... a minor attraction compared to the man!
We were obviously close... we took these pictures.

The concert was amazing, click the video for a little taste of james live!

one month of hormonal delight

2009-04-30T12:20:00.005-05:00

1 month photo shoot

1 month stats
weight- 10.8 pounds.. measured by Blake weighing himself and then her with him
head circumference 39.5
Max hours sleeping in a row 5 (once)
Average time between feeding 2.5 hours
Average number of outfits per day - 4
number of pictures- too many to count
animal imitations- lion (when yawning), snake (pretty much all the rest of the time when awake), and kitten (she enjoys purring when sleeping)
baseball games attended- 1
maximum time in stroller- 1.5 hours
cuteness factor- about a million
1 month photo shoot. 4/29/09

Here we are at the baseball game! She is getting started early.

I wish I could adequately qualify all the emotions challenges feelings and joy this last month has brought. As it is, I am not sure I even understand my personal transformation, much less possess the eloquence to describe it. That being said, I am compelled to at least attempt.

What is she looking at? Whatever it is she is intent!

My first month as a mother... wow I can't believe it has been a month. Lillian is growing cuter by the second and I don't want to miss one minute of her life, because, although she is not aware, I am all too aware, that this passes so fast. Currently she does not have a lot of tricks in her arsenal. She is extremely needy, and has slight confusion regarding day and night. She most likely has flash burn from the over 500 pictures taken, and counting, but she does not seem to mind. All in all, she is a great baby. Usually she cries with purpose and if you guess right, she is quickly consoled. While I don't want to wish away precious time, I look forward to the day when she smiles in recognition of her mom... or dad. I spend hours looking at her and think she is the most wonderful thing EVER. WoW, is this really me typing?

From a personal standpoint, I wish I could say that the hormones had subsided. Perhaps they have waned a bit. Now I only cry when there is a stimulus. It does not need to be a strong cause, but at least I can usually give a reason for the waterworks which have invaded my once more stoic existence. I have begun to blame fatigue for my emotional lability, though I fear part of me has forever embraced my heightened sensitivity. Maybe that is a good thing, we shall see.

I continue to stand in awe of God's wonderful creation... and in awe of the fact that I have a daughter that was completely grown inside of me. The past month has been a learning experience and I can't wait to see what will happen in the months ahead. Hopefully I will not be traumatized by the fact that my little girl is growing!

Our first road trip

2009-04-29T13:49:00.007-05:00

This past weekend we loaded up half our house and headed to Nashville for Blake's 10 year MBA high school reunion. This trip made me anxious for several reasons the least of which was I was going to meet most of his friends for the first time three weeks after giving birth and I had nothing to wear. Lucky for me I am an astute TJ Maxx shopper. Additionally, I was a little nervous about driving 3 hours in the car and leaving her for an extended amount of time for the first time. A couple of days before we had given her her first bottle. Blake did the honors, and it was weird to see her getting her nutrition from someone else! She did pretty good. We will continue to practice in preparation for the dreaded start of residency.

Here is Lillian's first bottle. As and aside...note the massive mountain of laundry beside the couch... such is my life!

On the way down she was such a trooper. We stopped once for her to eat, but otherwise she was pretty content and took the car rides in stride. When we arrived in Nashville, Grammy had set up her crib (blake's old crib) in Blake's room and had it decorated with a bumper and cute striped sheet. She also had a basket of all kinds of baby care items which would have helped me eliminate about 1/3 of my load. I literally packed the entire house. Blake asked how we would fit everything in the car when we had to be gone a week. i told him that we would take the same amount just do laundry! Nonetheless I am happy to know on future trips I will not need to pack everything she owns.

This is my first nap in my "Grammy's house bed" The blanket is so soft and we love the polka dots!

Blake and I had a great time at the reunion, and there was no shortage of babysitters. We actually forgot something and had to go back to the house about 5 minutes after we left and three people were changing her diaper... now that's some teamwork.

Here we are getting ready for the reunion. I have always wanted a red dress!These are our good friends Erik and Michelle Milam. They were married the day before Lilly was born, and we were sad to miss it, though we got a good deal out of staying home!

She was carted around everywhere and even managed to watch Grammy and Kera finish the Nashville half marathon in 85 degree heat along with about 100,000 (not exaggerated) people.

Grammy and Aunt Kera did great in their race. Had I been a little more organized Lilly would have made some t-shirts to commemorate the event. Maybe next time!

Sunday we attended Grammy's church and showed her off, and then had lunch with Nonnie and Pops. I am learning how to feed her in a variety of interesting situations, and each day I learn to adjust to life with a 1 month old a little more.

Ready for church. This was the dress I wore in one of my aunts wedding. It has been very fun dressing her in the dresses that I remember from childhood pictures!

Popaw takes good care of Lilly... He has never moved so fast to come after her when the opportunity arises... I think she has plenty of love!Nonnie has her hands full. Check out Lilly's polo outfit! She is styling already.

LILLY SMILES!!

2009-04-27T23:25:00.002-05:00

Lillian smiled today (not socially yet, in her sleep) but at least thanks to my handy work with the camera, we were able to capture it. Jac and I were talking about what we are going to do when she smiles for real and when she starts making other faces b/c we take millions of pictures already. Oh well. Here she is...and yes, it's true, she is REALLY, STINKING CUTE!!!

pictures and easter two posts down...

2009-04-21T22:38:00.007-05:00

Here are a couple new pics. Look down two posts to see her first bath and easter dress. I did not get them uploaded in a timely fashion.

Blake is sporting the MOBY wrap. Everyone needs one. These are amazing, and you get to see what a kangaroo might feel like.

This is a gift from grammy... I think all diapers make butts look big!

The cherries are a shout out to Jodi... Jodi are you reading?

What 2 week old sleeps with her hands behind her head as though she is soaking up the rays on a sunny day?

I love this because this resembles a picture of her in the hospital.

Lilly's friend and potential future husband (though the list is long) made a bribe to move up the list with this swing! She likes it! Thanks Will~

i think this was my dress...

Like father like daughter. Blake is actually making fun of how our little pumpkin sleeps.

This is Lilly practicing her bad habit of only sleeping when held.

2009-04-16T21:50:00.002-05:00

For those of you with face book. Lilly has more photos available at ashleigh peak photography. You can just search for her and get to her page without any problems. They are insanely good. I look like a goof in a couple of them, but alas, what can you do. The real star is Lilly, and Ashleigh for being so super amazing. I made sure to thank her for the fact that now I have to buy a ton of pictures instead of paying uncle sam!

Initiation into the club.

2009-04-14T21:53:00.005-05:00

So I totally feel like I have been hazed into the fraternity of motherhood. Lately our sweet little Lilly has been spitting up in massive quantities. This resembles vomit, but is not which i have to clarify regularly to myself as I do my patients. I can now empathize with why they think it is vomit. What it is, however, is voluminous nasty spit up. This nasty habit has created some ritualistic feeding patterns on my part. I am always hesitant to feed her more after she has finished on one side because on more than one occasion this has produced a mess all over me, the boppy, her, her hair, the blankets etc. I still feed her, because you have to, but I am just holding my breath. This morning we were doing our routine. I feed her, burp her, she spits up, this time only a little, I feed her a little more, she burps, she spits up, then I hold her in the upright position trying no to irritate the reflux monster. After I held her for about 15 minutes I laid her on the bed so I could use the bathroom and brush my teeth. About the time I started brushing my teeth I heard her start to hiccup. A regular occurrence. So I go about my business keeping an eye on her. All of the sudden it happens. Massive eruption. She spit up all over the waterproof pad she was on, off the pad to the bed, she was laying in a puddle of spit up. It was in her hair... pretty much everywhere. Luckily after the previous spit ups of the day I had not put more clothes on her so we did not shed another outfit... just the sheets. so I get a towel, remove her from her puddle and realize that she has pooped and it was coming out her diaper. To the bath I thought. So we go to the whale tub and all is well, we get clean, wash all the milk off, and I take her out. As soon as I get her out of the tub and on my lap... she pees on me. REALLY? Are you serious. I mean it could not have been better planned. So I thought to myself as I started my first of 3 loads of laundry created since 6am this morning... so this is what it is really like! Too bad mom left before the real laundry began. I don't think our sheets have been changed twice in one week EVER. With this episode I welcomed myself to the club!

Lilly has a belly button and her first Easter all in the same week.

2009-04-14T17:51:00.006-05:00

Well Saturday morning was the day! Lilly had been hanging on to her cord for two weeks, and though it looked like it was getting close to falling off, it was still attached as of the first feeding. When I woke up to feed her the second time that morning, I picked her up and did a double take. What was that black thing in the bed? A Bug? Blood? what in the world. Then it hit me. I jerked up her gown and there it was... her little belly button. She was not as excited about this as I was. I took a picture of the cord in her basket, and took a picture of her new button!

The cord in the basket... sorry for those with a weak stomach, but this is monumental!

I then proceeded to sing... you get to take a big girl bath for easter... you get to take a big girl bath for easter. She was thrilled as you may imagine. I would be too if I got to take my first bath in the whale tub.

She actually liked this much more than it appears! Note the new button!

She actually survived the bath and lived to tell about it. Thanks for the beautiful towel malinda!Whew.. now I am ok!

The night before easter she abandoned her previously great sleeping patterns of approx 3 hours at a time for a 1/5-2 hour stretch between waking... which meant that I slept in 1 hour intervals more or less. needless to say we did not make it to the sunrise service. This prompted the "Dress how we act movement" observed below.

This is also comical because those of you who were around in August through December know that this is how I referred to my sweet little girl. Not something I am proud of, but sometimes, I hate to say, she lives up to it! Also. this is how she sleeps when she is not swaddled. How funny?

We did however go to the early service and she wore a great little smocked easter dress that Mrs. Finnern, my friend Kathryn's mom, got for her on our girl's trip to New Orleans. Enjoy the pics.

My first easter dress! I love the smocking!

Why I am not a professional photographer!

2009-04-10T18:46:00.008-05:00

This is the link that I posted a couple of days ago... I guess about a week now. You can visit her blog at www.ashleighpeak.squarespot.com. Didn't she do an amazing job? I can't wait to see the rest.

After Ashleigh Peak came and took amazing pictures of Lilly, I decided to try my hand at the artistic. I mean really, how hard could it be. My sister had given me a bouquet of huge stargazer lilies when Lilly was born, and I wanted to take some pictures of Lilly with the lilies before they died. Since my sister is very artistic and savvy the pressure was on. If the first picture worked out I was planning to try my luck and take another picture with the lilies the Bergerons had given us. By the way, as an aside, the Bergerons gave us lilies from 1-800-FLOWERS, they came closed up and gave us instructions on how to care for them. These things have been GORGEOUS, so if you are ever planning to send flowers with 1-800-FLOWERS, and can drop some dough, go with the lilies. They are still going strong 1.5 weeks later. OK, enough of that, on to the disaster. So I feel Lilly and get her all relaxed. I take a tip from Ashleigh and use a white back drop. I put Lilly down and go get the flowers. I neglected to take the little pollen things off the lily because I was not planning for her or anyone to touch them. Blake of course had already wanted me to take them off. I said, "no I got it." Well no sooner did I put them down, she morrowed, and there was pollen all over the sheet, me, and Lilly. My newborn looked like a umpa lumpa. The entire side of her body was orange, and wiping it did little to remove the stain!
Tara gave us these lilies the day Lilly was born... they opened beautifully!

These lilies are from the Bergerons.

Disaster number one

and two...

Later in the week, after we gave her a bath and cautiously removed the pollen stems, Lilly was sound asleep again and I went for it a second time, These worked out a little better, but nowhere near as great as Ashleigh's. This further confirms my lack of artistic capabilities even when I try really hard.

More Pictures

2009-04-09T13:43:00.002-05:00

Greetings! Things are great in the Bergeron Household. Lilly is holding strong, eating somewhere between every hour and 4. I'm still on vacation for the rest of this week and the weekend which is nice, and Jaclyn is trying to cram some sleep in when she can. We have given her a few sponge baths to this point which she doesn't really mind. Plus, it gives us a great chance for pictures in her Cookie Monster hooded towel. (I really, really wish they would make one of those in Adult sizes because I would ROCK THAT!).

Mom (Pam) brought down the cradle that I used when I was a baby, and now Lilly sleeps there at night, and she really seems to like it.
She really is very alert when she is awake. Thanks for all the support thus far, we really appreciate it.

Motherhood... wow what an experience.

2009-04-04T12:42:00.017-05:00

Lilly and her flower band on her first day home from the hospital. She is so fashionable

This is one of my favorite pictures. This is what she always looked like when she was wheeled into the room at night to eat. What sweet bonding times we have when we are both tired. It is our private time!

As everyone knows, my beautiful daughter was born at 0756am on March 29. In these few short days, my life has completely turned upside down. All my preconceived notions and thoughts have been tossed out the window for a richer perspective. I stare down at my little girl and wonder how I could have every wanted a puppy rather than a baby. I find myself awake at 3am thinking how did i get so lucky to be awake at 3am with this wonderful creation. How could anyone deny the existence of God when you look at these little ones and ponder how they were created from two cells.
Throughout the pregnancy, especially in the first few months, I shutter to think about my cavalier attitude towards pregnancy, motherhood, nursing, pretty much everything. I am not sure I would have done much different in terms of staying active and pretending that I was not pregnant, but I am sure that some of my comments made to draw a laugh or poke fun of the little one I was carrying, I would have never said. Perhaps it is the hormones, or just my overwhelming love of this little one, but I am quite certain that any discomfort I might have experienced was well worth the pain. How could I have been so blessed.
Up until the day of her birth I was concerned that I might not love her enough. I was unable to imagine how I might love something enough to want to take her everywhere and plan my life around her. For three years Blake and I have been able to go as we pleased and do what we wanted at the spur of a moment. I thought I would miss the spontaneity, the quick/long car trips with no stops, but alas, now I can't imagine going somewhere without her, nor can i understand why i was so worried about it. When I say my perspective has done a 180, that might be an understatement.
Here are some of the jewels God has given me in the past week. Some are more sentimental than others.
1. The way your child recognizes and cuddles with her mother is different than she cuddles with others. They really do know you. She curls up on my chest and sighs and reaches for my face and I almost immediately tear up. She is perfect in my eyes, though I know we are all born fallen, she seems a little closer to heaven.
2. When babies open their eyes and take in the world, you can almost see the blank slate being filled. Everything is new and interesting... not that she can see that much yet, but I can imagine.
3. C-sections are the way to go... I don't know if it is a tribute to staying active during pregnancy or what but my recovery has been very easy, and while I am not quite up to my normal level of activity, I am not bothered much by the limitation. And I have none of the other pain involved in a vaginal delivery... for that I am thankful. Especially since she was 8lb 14 oz
4. I never thought I could love something so much. I don't remember what occupied that space of my heart before she got here... even as I type this the hormones have kicked in- waterworks everywhere... I can't even control it. This from the girl who hardly ever cries in public.
5. I want nothing more than to protect her from everything- I can't even imagine what I will feel when someone hurts her feelings, or when she comes to me crying. It is funny how the one thing I always struggle with is handing control of all situations to the Lord. Given that constant struggle, I have not been dealt the ultimate challenge. It is even more difficult to automatically remember that this dear one is held in the palm of His hands, and if I fail to remember that the enormity of my responsibility to protect her is overwhelming and impossible. I am not sure I can even put in to words how much I desire for her life to be as painless as possible. In one fell swoop your focus switches from yourself and your own well being, to hers.
6. Having your own child puts the sacrificial atonement of Jesus even more real. You can almost relate to the mind blowing love the Father has for us. I cannot imagine a love great enough to offer my daughter to anyone!
7. Babies purr kinda like kittens... My favorite thing is her snuggling and purring.
8. After you no longer have an infant in your stomach, you can actually dance with your husband and not have a barrier :)
9. I can't listen to any sentimental songs without immediately tearing up. In fact I don't need to have a reason to cry. Every night at about 6 or 7 I get a little weepy, and anything, as little as looking at her, or someone telling me that I should enjoy the moments because they pass so quickly will set me off. By the way, once you have the precious little one, you are very aware at how fast the moments pass. She is already 1 week old. I can't measure her in days anymore. sad day! Not being a huge fan of uncontrolled emotion, I am ready for the hormones to balance out.
10. Mothers grow supersonic ears. I was able to hear Lilly start to wake up, turn on the light, feed her, change her diaper, snuggle her, and burp her without Blake even hearing her. Really?
11. The first thing that I noticed about her that had changed: She grew eyelashes!
12. Babies make the sweetest faces when they are sleeping, or even awake. She has an Elvis smirk, appropriate given her birth city, she smiles, she frowns, and does this little O shape with her mouth which I love. Well... let's be honest I pretty much love everything about her.
13. Having a baby has made me love my mom even more, if that was possible. I totally understand how much my mom loves me. I cannot thank her enough for all her unconditional love, support, advice and understanding. She might be the best mom ever! She allowed me to be independent and forced me to make my own decisions, while carefully guiding me and influencing me to make wise ones. She has been here for the last 2 weeks and I could not have done it without her. She is up when I feed her in the middle of the night (part of her inability to sleep) and keeps me company when I am about to fall asleep. I hear her reading the same books to Lilly that she read to me, and it warms my heart. It is the sweetest thing. She has busted tail to make the house look wonderful and to make sure my transition to motherhood was as atraumatic as possible. It breaks my hear that life has taken us to Memphis, and that she will not be around as much. She is such a great Grandma. Lilly is a lucky girl! I love you mom.

Me and mom the day before Lilly was scheduled to come. This is the last belly pic :) She kept saying... "wow it really is like a basketball... I can't believe it, I was huge!"

Lilly has a photo shoot

2009-04-04T12:38:00.003-05:00

I hate for this to be my inaugural blog as a new mom.... trust me I have a lot to comment on. In six short days my life has completely changed for the better. I didn't have any concept of what this little one would do to me. I really want to blog on this so that I can remember what I was thinking during these first few precious days. This however will take me a bit longer. For now, here are some photos that were taken by a professional photographer to help with her portfolio. Please check it out, and if you are in Memphis and need a photographer, give her a call! The photos are amazing. http://ashleighpeak.squarespace.com.

We're Home!

2009-04-01T22:48:00.004-05:00

It's Blake. After 3 nights in the hospital, only 2 DAYS!! of pain medication for Jaclyn (after a major abdominal surgery), and an overwhelming generous and loving group of family and friends, we made it home this afternoon. We got Lilly loaded in her car seat, which she did not seem to mind actually, then got loaded in the car for the first time as a family. The drive home was nice; Lilly did not appreciate the slow driving as evident by her little screams but on the interstate she did great. She was awake the entire drive home! Jaclyn's mom, Ruth Ann had spent the past several days cleaning the house and getting it ready b/c she was going to stay with us for the next week or so, and it looked amazing. We were greeted by a huge stork balloon, a sign over our door and then followed up by a beautiful bouquet of fresh Lillies from my mom, Pam.

I am still trying to fully process what it means to now have a daughter, to be a dad and a husband at the same time. I will probably blog about this in the coming days. I just know that I am blessed infinitely beyond what I deserve. For now...what everyone looks at blogs for anyways...PICTURES!!! I do think she is most beautiful baby ever, and I feel that I have some authority to say that b/c I am a pediatrician.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LILLIAN!!

2009-03-29T19:22:00.004-05:00

Future Wildcat. Davidson College class of 2031?

Hello everyone! This morning at 0756, Lillian made her appearance. She weighed 8lbs 14oz, exercised her lungs greatly, and has been the gem of everyone. Just a few pictures now and more to follow soon.

Jaclyn is a trooper, is doing great, and not in much pain. She has already stoo

d up and started to stretch. Thanks for your continued prayers.

Calm before the Storm...

2009-03-28T21:54:00.004-05:00

This is Blake. Well, tonight is our last night as a 2 person family. The coming of Lilly, while seemingly always in the future, is looming near. There is a very strange mix of excitement, fear, anxiety, peace and anticipation all for this little one. Our extended families have arrived, we are packing our bags (the typical procrastinators), and I am going to try to load the car tonight in order to be at the hospital at 5:30am. We cherish any and all prayers sent our way for a very uneventful and smooth surgery and recovery of both mom and baby.

Here is one last pregnancy picture of Jaclyn and her sister Tara, and as of now, the baby should be out in approx. 9 hours!!

Hysterical Post

2009-03-21T04:39:00.002-05:00

Hello - It's currently 0425am and I'm on my last night of nights in the PICU. In between fiddling with vents based on the recent rush of ABGs and getting the incessant flow of pink progress notes started, I read this post from a blog called stuff christians like. evidently, this has been around for a year or so but I am just learning about it. While i have no idea who writes the blog, the author is a particularly witty mix of funny and thought provoking; much like the christian blog version of "Scrubs." This post made me laugh out loud in the middle of the ICU, so I thought I would share...particularly the part about transformers. Enjoy! The comments people make at the end of the post are pretty funny too!
http://stufffchristianslike.blogspot.com/2009/03/505-visiting-people-at-hospital.html

A perfect Match!

2009-03-20T12:35:00.011-05:00

Last fall my grandmother came and helped me plant all these great flowers. I just wanted to share how cute the front of my house looks :)

Yesterday was Match Day! For those not in the medical field, this is the day when all fourth year medical students in the entire country, or world for that matter, who are trying to begin residency in their chosen field next year find out which program they will attend. Due to the fact that Blake is in his second year of residency and applying for a fellowship in heme/onc at St. Jude, Memphis was pretty much our only choice. As I have said before, single parenting as an intern is really not that cute. The day began with a brunch and gathering of my entire class at a building downtown. Friends and family were present and excitement was definitely in the air. Close to 12pm my class all took their assigned seats to await the "passing of the envelopes" containing our fate. Though I knew where I was headed, I found myself getting excited. Once the envelopes had been distributed an announcement was made that we could open the envelopes. I found it more interesting to see where my friends were headed, than even looking at my own letter. There were tears of joy and disappointment, but at the end of the day, most of us will be doing what we want next year even if it is not in our desired city. The moment was also surreal as it was the first time I realized... this is the beginning of the end. My medical school career is quickly coming to an official end, and I have made such great friends over the years, whom are now scattered all over the country. We truly have one of the most fun, best classes ever!

Here I am with my breakfast, Lilly in tow, getting ready for the big moment!
We will be together in Memphis :)
the chairs were labeled and waiting!
here we sit...will the waiting end?
Here it is!
Sadly... (for me) but great for her... Malinda is heading to Mayo next year. My gifts will have to switch from Kitchen utensils to sub-zero gear!

Later that night we headed to a bar downtown to hear one of our classmate's bands play for our official match day party! What a blast. I had no idea Fred was so good, although I was not surprised. After hours of dancing, my swollen feet carried me home, and I ended the day thinking about the beginning of an end. What a challenging, frustrating, and ultimately fulfilling 4 years this has been.

In my last blog I mentioned the 3rd annual crawfish bowl :) This was a blast. See some fun pics below!

We rented a cotton candy machine for the occasion... mmmm I love cotton candy!

Here we are gathered around the tables, downing some mud bugs.

Malinda, Annie, Anju, Melissa, Minesh all take in the action

Me with the newly engaged Kat Wells! Congrats Kat!

This was one of the funniest moments of the night. Bryant wanted to show off his belly, and freaked out about mine :) He thought my belly button was gross. Can you believe that ?

cake baking and a big week!

2009-03-17T15:19:00.006-05:00

Well, things are progressively moving toward the inevitable. I am due two weeks from Thursday which is crazy. One of the advantages to pregnancy has been my increased craving for sweets. Luckily i have had ample opportunity to bake cakes of late. My favorite is this chocolate layer cake found in the bride
and groom cookbook from WS. I highly recommend it as nothing in there is bad. The other cake pictured is a raspberry cake, which is nice for a spring day, but definitely not as WONDERFUL as the chocolate. I really hope that my ability to pass up cake returns when she comes out :) Both of these cakes start out with a boxed mix and then you add to it. This method of cake baking is definitely my preferred style as it ensures the cake does not become too dry. It also ensures that for the first time ever I am not sad to be taking left overs home... this is sooooooooo dangerous. I really am carrying blake's child!

Monday I found out that I matched in Med/Peds somewhere... hopefully Memphis, otherwise Blake is going to think I did not rank as we discussed and we are going to be heading to counseling, as well as figuring out how to get me out of a contract I have technically already signed. :) Hooray for having a job! Thursday I find out where.

In other news, we had yet another shower, man are we loved, I got my jogging stroller :) and my belly has continued to grow.

\This is the huge view :) The next is the more realistic, but equally large view. (~36w)

This is the long and largely anticipated BOB iron man- mac daddy- jogging stroller. Lilly will be spending much time in this, she just doesn't know it yet. Thanks Aunt Malinda and Aunt Robyn... you two are too much :) I am borderline obsessed with this stroller! (~37w)

This week is crazy. We have events every night! Tonight we have the third annual crawfish bowl.. maybe that spicy food will encourage a little movement towards labor induction. Tomorrow I have my weekly check up and we are getting pedicures in preparation for Saturday's med school prom. Thursday is match, with pretty much a day long party, not to mention the fact that the NCAA basketball tourney starts. I have been known to 1. win my share of pools, and 2. schedule ankle surgery around the date so I could be home for the best 4 days of ball in a row instead of going to high school. ;) Friday we have another picnic, and Saturday, as mentioned before is med school prom. Surely there will be many pics that come from this week.

the end of an era... showering of love... and nights of insomnia

2009-03-04T04:12:00.014-06:00

I have recently passed a major life milestone that merits mentioning. As of last Friday, I have completed all of the schooling I will most likely undertake...EVER. I finished medical school! So now I have tons of time to finish getting things in order for the next adventure.

Sleep... I have already begun to appreciate the rare, uniterrupted night of sleep. Tonight I went to bed around 9:30, only to wake up before midnight and not be able to fall back to sleep. I am not sure whether it is the weird position Lilly has placed herself, or the indigestion that appears without any relation to what I eat or when I eat it. It is now 4:19am, and I have been out of bed since 1. I tried to lie there for a while, but hearing blake sleep so soundly just made me jealous, and I thought my tossing might wake him. After a couple hours of perousing old Southern Livings (thanks emily), reading the happiest baby on the block, in hopes of charming lilly out of excessive crying, and switching lastly to March, the latest novel by Geraldine Brooks, which is about the father's experience from Little Women during the civil war, I have now resorted to watching The Bachelor: After the final rose, and thinking how much more productive sleeping would be. This confirms it... I hate the bachelor. Oh my gosh, this is the most pathetic passage of time I have chosen in quite sometime. In order to make myself feel a little better about my choices, I have chosen to blog simultaneously and only occasionally switch to see the screen. I mean this episode is dripping with all the drama and emotion I typically dispise! I am so sorry that things don't work out when you court 27 women at once... big stinking surprise that you are a little confused. ~whaterver.

Now onto more productive topics: Blake and I have had the tremendous blessing to be given two baby showers to help us prepare for Lilly. Still having one more to go, I find myself overwhelmed by the generosity and love of our family and friends. The first shower was hosted by Blakley Fowler, Kristen Bowman, Erin Sturdivant, Anca Sommerville, and Lauren Chipman. The shower was hosted at Blakley's house and was attended by many of Blake's fellow residents, as well as our moms
My mom gave a little spa treatment to each guest to help us all relax. It was terrific, and we received so many great gifts. Lilly now has a diaper bag, carseat, bouncey chair, onsies, pretty dresses, socks, toys, blankets, and more.

The second shower was thrown in Nashville by Kera and Pam. Pam had spent a ton of time preparing for this event. She is one of the craftiest, most creative people I know, and the spread for the shower was no disappointment. She made the most beautiful diaper cake ever, the table was set with silver, crystal and everything was accented by pink.

Having such parties starts to make you realize that there is actually a little one on the way. Many friends and family attended from the Nashville area. We were again blessed with laughter, games, and many gifts. High chairs, baby bjorns, oneise, bathing supplies, jumpers.... The list goes on. The house has been transformed and taken over by Lilly, and she is not even here! (this take over is not helped by the fact that currently all of our furniture is in our main room while we are redoing our floors, which are almost done!)

With one more shower to go, we are unable to adequately express our gratitude for all the gifts and love of our friends and family. We hope that the love will continue on the emotional rollercoaster we are about to encounter.

Man, are we handy....

2009-02-27T12:53:00.005-06:00

I have been meaning to catch up on the rest of the events since the beginning of february, but for now, I will post some pictures of our newest project. About a week ago we decided to buy hardwood laminate flooring for our house and lay it ourselves. This has been quite and experience, and I must say gives me a little chip on my shoulder for what a tough pregnant girl I am... sawing, hammering etc. However they get down, the floors look great. We have been working a little at a time because I don't do any of the frustrating hard stuff so I have to wait until blake gets home to make the difficult cuts. Thanks to Joe who gave us a hand and lent us his saws. Hopefully the house will be in order before Lilly gets here. (you can see her bed no longer looks the same) I am beginning to get a little nervous on that end, but hey, what can you do?

Stay tuned for pictures from my first, and probably second shower, by the time I get them written, and Monica's wedding experience :)

Lilly goes to DC and the Big Easy...

2009-02-22T16:34:00.015-06:00

I have been chastised for not adequately updating my blog. I had no idea I had so many fans! Just kidding. We have been crazy lately fitting everything into a finite amount of time we have before the baby comes and I have tons of pictures to show, but have not had the time to sit and write.

All that being said, writing has become slightly more difficult these days. I think I am beginning to understand the "brain drain" other women talk about. I have had to begin proof-reading my emails such that the recipient does not assume I have been drinking upon reading what I wrote. Flight of ideas does not even begin to describe how a sentence begins normal and then sounds like gibberish. I suppose that is my disclaimer for all posts starting now.

With every week I continue to get bigger, but thankfully am still holding on to somewhat of a normal sleep schedule, exercise routine, and daily life. I am holding my breath, as is Blake, for when this becomes obsolete. I once told Blake, that I don't really mind being pregnant, now that the nausea has passed, (during which I was wondering how anyone got dooped into having more than one child) so long as the pregnancy does not drastically affect my daily life. I still do most things I have always done, including spending every free moment I am not in school traveling to keep in touch with good friends. I think, though I might have one more trip in me if I can convince Blake, that my traveling days have finally ended, but they ended with a BANG! I have since been quarantined to the Memphis area if Blake is not traveling with me. I think he is scared that I will go into labor and he will not be able to get there and he will miss the entire experience. Normally I would tell him to stop being so sensitive (I know, you are thinking... wow Jaclyn, that is so sensitive of you) but given the gravity of becoming parents and the fact that this is a huge life changing experience, I have decided to be considerate.

About a month ago I ventured to Washington DC to visit one of my best friends from college - Robyn, who is getting married in May. How I am going to manage to fit into that dress 4 weeks post partum will, I am sure, be a subject I will talk about when this becomes a reality! Anyways some of her friends were hosting a bridal shower, and as the matron of honor I thought I would try to help/attend. So Lilly and I fly to DC and arrive in a winter wonderland of ice. While this slightly derails my fitness routine (uh-hem loose routine at that) we had a great time and it was great to have some pictures with Robyn before we both go through huge life changes :)

The shower was lovely, Jill and Michelle did great jobs, and despite the fact that the theme was wine and cheese, a theme somewhat lost on me, Lilly and I survived the horrid temptation. Some of the highlights included making me into the shotgun bride with toilet paper. I think my team was at a definite disadvantage given the extra girth, and the fact that the dress could in no way resemble the wedding dress she will wear. I might note that my team should have been at an advantage given the fact that I was one of two people having already seen the gorgeous gown! We had a great time, I miss seeing her more often, and can't wait to fit into that dress and dress Lilly up for her first big event!

THE BIG EASY..... 2 weeks before Mardi Gras

I had never been to New Orleans. This is something most people in Memphis find hard to believe until I remind them that I grew up in VA, and we went to New York, not Louisiana, to go to a big city. Nonetheless, when my friend Stephen Choate married my friend Kathryn and they moved to NO for residency, I knew a trip was in my future. I had been telling Kathryn that I wanted to come visit for quite sometime, and as the time grew closer for Lilly to arrive, the time for my girls trip to New Orleans was drawing to a swift close. Somehow we managed to get our schedules together and her mom drove me down to have a girls weekend.

Upon my arrival I declared my intent: To eat my way through the Big Easy! I mean what better time to be in a city with great food than when you can almost eat guilt free! I had bignets, Po'Boys, and the most delicious Cajun red fish EVER! The meal at Jacque-mos was quite possibly the best food I have eaten in a couple years. Needless to say the cuisine did not disappoint.

We spent time walking around the French Quarter, looking at architecture, the occasional palm reader and steering clear of all the sketchiness including the bars and voodoo. (that junk is scary) One of the coolest things was discovering the above-ground cemeteries. Because New Orleans is actually below sea level, they are unable to bury people in the ground. Weird huh?

We had fantastic weather- unlike DC- it was 75 the entire weekend. I went running/trotting in the garden district, and just enjoyed spending time with Kathryn and learning about her new home. All in all it was such a great weekend, a perfect end to my single excursions. Kathryn gave me a beautiful hand made outfit, and her mom generously funded all the fun and bought Lilly one of her first smocked dresses! Smocking is a big deal down here, as are embroidered spit-up cloths (yet again another story for another day).

William Woodrow Jones IV

2009-01-21T22:15:00.004-06:00

Well, yet another hurdle down in my
pregnancy. Yesterday my good friend Emily Jones, also in her fourth year of medical school, had her baby. We have been pregnant together for the past 7 months, so I have been able to call her when new things that no one tells you will happen to you happen. It has been great fun to share in the experience with her.

Whenever I felt like the impending birth of Lilly was a little too close, there was always a part of me that said..."emily still has not had her baby." As of yesterday that comfort has been traded for a beautiful baby boy.

While we are very happy with his safe arrival, he came one day too late for one of our friends. Despite our best efforts, William did not come on MLK day. Malinda, my other great friend had been in town from Knoxville and we took emily out to dinner long with Anju and Katie P for a spicy induction of mexican food and to celebrate Anju and Emily's birthdays. Although William did not come quick enough, I think we would all like to think that our one last ditch spicy effort had something to do with his safe arrival!

a taste of what's to come

2009-01-13T22:51:00.003-06:00

We went for another doctors visit today and had the amazing opportunity to receive a 3D US. It is really late and my week in the ICU is about to kill me because I am getting up before 5 to get to the hospital, so I will comment on my thoughts about the craziness that is recognizing your nose on the baby that now seems real later. For now we wanted to post these pictures so others might share in the amazement.

Ben's Birthday and New Year's Eve

2009-01-01T13:40:00.004-06:00

2 nights ago, we were invited to Ben's 28th birthday party where Kristen made her unreal chicken pot pie (something about a full can of alfredo sauce makes anything delicious), complete with individual initials on the finely egg-washed flaky crusts. Dinner was amazing, then it was followed by a strawberry cake complete with made from scratch strawberry butter cream icing. So delicious! (wow, i feel like i could work at a magazine writing captions!)

We had a great night of just spending time together, and although Willis didn't demonstrate his newly developed tricks we still got some good pictures. Scott Adelman stopped by and brought his typical excitement and commentary on most conversation topics. It was fun. This also gave me a chance to try out our new camera, including my first attempt at uploading video onto the blog so that when our daughter comes, I will be an old pro. So here it is, a video of Willis laughing at the camera and holding his head up (but no rolling over...)

For the new year, we spent the evening at Hunter and Emily Jones' house and the Brotherton's were there and it was a low key night of just hanging out. Emily was 37 weeks pregnant and Jac is now 27 weeks today, so we took the obligatory pregnant belly picture. Stupid ABC did not replay the ball dropping in central time, so we were watching Ne-Yo singing or something stupid, and Jaclyn looked at her watch and noticed it was 12:03, so we missed the new year. I may write ABC an angry letter. Who knows?

Christmas in Memphis

2008-12-30T16:24:00.003-06:00

This Christmas, I had the *ahem* distinct pleasure of being on call Christmas eve and missing basically all of my favorite parts of Christmas, namely Christmas eve at home with family, spending time together, eating, laughing, going to church and remembering Jesus and why we all can get together in the first place. So, I was not in a very good mood most of Christmas Eve, the ED (as always) admitted about 30 kids and 20 of them should have gone home (but that is a different and much longer post) and so they kept all of us up all night. But, I was able to go home a few hours early (and by few, I got to go after ONLY 27 hours in the hospital, not the usual 30) which made it sightly better. I have to admit that when I'm working and not getting to rest, it is very hard for me to keep a proper perspective on things, especially when I am missing things that I think are very valuable and missing times that I know I will cherish. I get very selfish, very bitter, and it is definitely a sin that God keeps bringing readily to my attention.
Anyways, my family came down, Kera on Christmas eve, then my mom and nonnie and poppaw on late afternoon Christmas day, then Dad on the 26th. Jaclyn, Kera and I were invited to eat lunch with the Jemison's, some of the mature members of our sunday school class, so we had a delightful lunch time with them before the rest of my family got here for Christmas.
The more I am working and made to spend time away from those I love most, the more I come to cherish the time I do have with everyone, specifically, my wife and rest of the family. There was not major news over Christmas, no very serious conversations, just excitement over being together, talking about the future, reminiscing about the good times of the past and of course, lots of great meals and treats to enjoy. It was a few days filled with those little moments that make life so precious. Sure, we did the presents, but that to me is secondary. It's nice to see people open gifts and flattering to receive them for sure, but the best part is just being together.
We were both sorry that Jaclyn's parents couldn't have made it down for Christmas. Jaclyn got to talk with most of her family on the phone, and while it is not ideal (a euphemism to say that it is terrible), she enjoyed getting to speak with them and wishing them all a very merry Christmas.

5 reasons I may be the best husband ever...

2008-12-21T03:45:00.003-06:00

So, It's almost 4am and i'm on call at the bon-bon and dealing with pissy (can i say that on the internet?) parents who don't want their baby to be stuck with an iv...but that iv delivers fluids and meds that this particular baby REALLY, REALLY needs, so I just dragged my grumpy self up to the room to talk some sense into them. At times like these I really want to say what I think of such business, but alas, I do not. And then perhaps alas more, i start thinking how great a person i am that I do not say those things. terrible I know. (I am very aware that I think them, which is a different post.) Then in my A.D.H.D. stream of consciousness mind, I start thinking how great I am at other things, such as playing addictinggames.com, laying on the couch and watching football, and being a husband..so that lead to this list of 5 things off the top of my head of exactly why I am such a good husband (if I say so myself), and at 0400 they seemed funny to me (read: great excuse for why these will not be funny at all).
In no particular order:

5) Bought surprise tickets for my wife to the ballet for our anniversary
4) Giving up a free, 3rd row ticket to the titans/steelers game tomorrow to spend time with my wife
3) I don't get in the way of my wife's cleaning tasks and let her do them mostly all herself because she doesn't like the way I fold stuff, and doesn't like the way i put some dishes away and doesn't like the way that i put silverware back in the drawer, and doesn't like the way i do most other cleanings either.
2) I allow my wife to do all of the christmas shopping by herself (or with malinda), because a 25 week pregant woman loves to be lost in crowds and traffic and around very strange post office workers. Her endeavors include buying all of the gifts for my family without the slightest bit of complaining, designing our christmas card, addressing envelopes, mailing them, and single handedly wrapping each gift that she bought (but i'm not really allowed to wrap gifts, either, because i'm not good at that).
1) I allow her to make me whatever she wants for dinner. almost every night.

Ok, maybe i'm not so great after all. Moral of this much longer (and probably less funny-er) than i intended story is that Jaclyn rocks. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I don't really like having to spend nights away from her. So, these are just a few of the ways that she serves me. So, readers, sorry if you puked a little in your mouth just now. eat a cookie and it will get rid of the taste. Oh, yeah, i'm really good at eating cookies too.

a great reunion

2008-12-19T14:27:00.008-06:00

Last night Blake and I traveled to Nashville to watch Behold the Lamb of God, Andrew Peterson's brilliant Christmas composing. It was the eve of our third anniversary, and I barely saw Blake until the show started around 7:30pm. The Bergeron's and I laughed as I ate dinner with my in-laws, sans my husband, in celebration of the day! Blake had to work and thus came up to Nashville just in time to see the show. (I tried to upload a picture of the cover of the CD, which I suppose would be the symbol of the tour, but once again my blogging skills have proven to be sub-par.)
The great part about the whole evening was that Mary McCulloch, my best friend from Davidson, was there to celebrate her birthday! Not only did I get to watch the most amazing show EVER- with fantastic singer/songwriters, live strings, and the like, but Mary is also pregnant (her second) and we are due within a week or so of eachother. This made for some GREAT pictures, (though not so great of me after walking in the rain to the theater) but great for memories! It was so fun to document our expanding waists and laugh about how our girls are going to be great friends!

In other news, We have had another ultrasound and everything looks great! Hopefully we will continue to have a non-eventful pregnancy, from the health standpoint of Lily. I would hardly describe some of MY experiences as "non-eventful." Our next visit to the OB is in January and we are so excited because we get a free 3D ultrasound... will she have my nose? Who knows! For now here is the latest pic.

It's a GIRL!!!!!!

2008-11-07T15:52:00.007-06:00

Great news. Last Tuesday we found out we are the parents to be of a little baby girl. It was phenomenal to see the baby actually look like a baby. The last time either of us had seen an US of the pregnancy, she looked like a sea monkey!

In the past week I have begun to feel better/normal, and I have also felt her move! This is the most amazing experience... it is so strange and yet so amazing. Blake has actually been able to feel her as well. She really likes sugar and OJ, which she demonstrates by extra activity... thus ensuring that she really is Blake's child!

A Post I Made A Long Time Ago...

2008-10-30T01:35:00.002-05:00

So here was a post i made almost exactly 1 year ago...Time really flies. The little girl is actually doing pretty well now although it's been at least 8 months since I have last seen her. I wanted to post this before I forgot about it.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007
I Thessalonians 5:16-18
"Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."

A few months ago, I had a little girl as a patient of mine while on the hematology service at LeBonheur whose situation caused this verse to haunt me. She came in with ITP (immune thrombcytopenic purpura), basically a disease where your own body attacks your platelets and kills them. Your platelets are very important for stopping any bleeding that may occur in your body, and if they get to be less than 40k then you are at a very increased risk of bleeding. Her plateletes were 0. She was a beautiful little girl, 8 years old, who loved cinderella, fresh peaches, those nasty humongous pickles, and was doing very well in school. She was a true giver as well. One day early in her hospital stay, her family (complete with at least 3 aunts, 10 cousins, a grandmother and mom who never left her side) brought her a lot of goodies because she was in the hospital. I came in her room that afternoon and was bugging her that she hadn't shared any of her rice crispy treats with me. Well, this little girl then offered me at least 3 different kinds and was mad at me when I didn't take any of them. I told her that I would stop by the next day and share one with her in her room so as not to take her food. For a week we tried everything medically known to get this sweet little girl's platelets to come back, but each time, our treatment failed. In this disease, you don't give platelets either because her body will just destroy them and she would be right back where she started. Well, the next morning when I came to the hospital, my patient was not in her room, her bed was gone, and I was confused. I pulled her chart and learned that she had developed a bleed into her head, the most devastating and rare complication of ITP, that happens in less than 0.01% of all kids with the disease. She was in intensive care, waiting for emergency surgery.

So, a long story made short, she got the surgery, her platelets recovered spontaneously (as they do in ITP), and she ended up staying for about 3 more weeks, but she is neurologically devastated. She is paralyzed on her right side (walking unassisted is not likely), may never speak again, and is looking at a long, hard road to recovery. For a few days there, though, nobody knew if she would survive, and it was during this time that I remembered the above verse in Thessalonians. It stared with the "pray continually" part, and I think I finally began to grasp a little of what this verse meant. Every idle second during those days and weeks surrounding my patient's complication, my mind and my spirit would turn towards her and her family. I had no choice but to pray; it was literally the only thing I could do. When my audible and mental prayers were done, by soul grieved for her and for her family. In quiet moments, I would hold back tears thinking of her, of how I never was able to make it back to share our rice crispy treat, of how she would not be able to twirl around in her cinderella dress any longer, of how her walk down the isle on her wedding day would not be how she invisioned it. It was almost overwhelming to go down that pathway. After going back to look at that verse, the particular sentence starts with "Be joyful always..." For good reason, that seemed impossible at times. Her family, though, lived out these verses and the inherent difficulty between them in a way that would have been impossible for me if my child were in the same situation. During her stay in the ICU, her family would write down bible verses on little yellow post-it notes and hang them on the wall of her room in the shape of a cross. They had somebody from their church praying for her day and night, and when their spirits would get down, they would claim the truths on those post-it notes. Every day when we made rounds and went to see her, her mom would encourage US, her doctors. She would remind me that "God is in control," that "God will get the glory when she walks again," or that "God has greater plans for her..." In my life, it has always been easy to be joyful and give God thanks because he has poured blessings on me and my family that I cannot even begin to count...but seeing this family live an example of this verse in light of these horrifying circumstances showed me that these commands are cyclical. It may start with the situation where all we can do is pray...our souls groan within us and the holy spirit inside of us intercedes, and then we can give thanks to God for these circumstances, for this chance to grow in faith, to witness His miracles, to see the Love of Jesus demonstrated with an encouaging word, a hand held, a tear shed...and a little girl who survived, who can still smile, can still eat her peaches and pickles, and who still can be loved. Finally, we can arrive to the point where we can be thankful and somehow this thankfulness can over time be transformed into Joy. I will continue to pray for her, to think often of her family, and to give thanks to God for their unearthly example of faith and what praying continually can mean to me.

Time for New Post: Halloween and Pam's (mom's) new puppy

2008-10-27T12:29:00.012-05:00

This is Blake. Jaclyn is 17 weeks pregnant now, and despite what everyone says, morning sickness is crap and it doesn't go away by 15 weeks. Last week alone she had several barf-ing episodes/scares, but I'll let her tell you about those. I guess I'll start doing what Ben Bowman does on his blog and post every now and then. I'll use this font.

Last weekend we made a trek back to nash-vegas for a small get together with a bunch of guys from our high-school state championship football team, then Sat. Night we went with my parents to my mom's work halloween party. My mom (who won the best overall costume) went as "The Cat in the Hat" and so she convinced us to be the "things" which were the sidekicks to the cat in the hat as I best remember. Jac was "thing 1" and my mom said that since she was pregnant, she should be "Thing 1 1/2"...so she was. I was "Thing 2". We had a great time and here are some pictures. My dad was albert einstein.

My mom just got a new rat...err, i mean puppy. It's a mix of about every small dog breed. His name is Snickers. He's very tame, and is a major lap dog as Jaclyn found out this weekend. He will just jump onto your lap, roll over onto his back and let you pet him. Jaclyn kept saying that he was me in dog form...not sure if that's a good thing or bad thing. Anyway, more to come later. I just wanted to post some funny pics from Halloween and actually update the blog. Enjoy!

fist official photo, and a rough season ahead

2008-09-13T19:57:00.003-05:00

I am sorry to report that since my last post, I have not kicked the morning sickness in the bud, and with the second trimester on the horizon, my future child has about a week to get it together. That being said, I thought I would post a picture of the little seamonkey so that others can see how strange babies look at 7 weeks.
On to the second subject... The tragedy that seems to be the Tennessee Volunteer 2008 season. I am afraid that we are in for a long fall here in vol country. They looked ok today, but only played UAB. I cannot hope for us to be so lukcy next weekend, even if it is my birthday!

nobody told me....

2008-08-31T14:01:00.002-05:00

So, we have big news in the Bergeron household... we are pregnant! Baby Bergeron will arrive sometime around April 2, 2009. This new state in which I find myself, has been met with so many emotions, fears, and feelings of utter nausea! Taking the pregnancy test is a weird phenomenon. While you always know there is a possibility that you could be pregnant, you never really think it is going to happen. Then BANG, out of nowhere your life is changed by a double line. You don't look or feel different at first, and yet you can't help but feel like everything has changed. As you may expect, I had all of these emotions, accompanied by the stress of how this fits into residency and life as a doctor. While none of these things have been resolved, nor will they anytime soon, my fears have been met with a great deal of peace and grace. I have a bad habit of freaking out and trying to fix everything myself. This is a vicious match of arm wrestling between me and God, where I alway lose, and by his patience and grace He teaches me to trust him, and ultimately restores the joy in whatever the situation may be.

Lately the situation at hand has been morning sickness, and pretty much everything associated with being pregnant. I have found that it is really difficult to begin the bonding process with your child when the only indication that said child exists is the fact that you want to throw up your toenails pretty much every minute you are awake. With this attitude you might imagine that i was not feeling the blessings that children can be, but rather feeling sorry for myself. I had no idea the labor of love all of our mothers endure to bring us into the world and care for us for the rest of her life. I mean... we make our awfulness known from the get go. I have apologized to my mom on numerous occasions these past 9 weeks.

So on to what nobody tells you.... morning sickness is the worst thing ever... and "morning" is a most unfortunate misnomer. Morning sickness as some male obviously called it begins anytime your feet hit the floor, whether that is to go pee in the middle of the night, or just to get up and attempt to move on with your day. This feeling will last until you find a way to fall asleep at night. Holy Cow it is NO FUN. The feeling can best be described as either feeling so hungry that you are nauseated and no food seems good enough to put in your zipcode much less near your mouth.... or as a flu that lasts the better part of 6 weeks. The foods that you can choke down this week become absolutely repulsive next week, it is bizarre. Luckily after bearing the burden un-medicated for a couple of weeks, I have discovered phenergan... the best medicine ever, which has allowed me to resume a functional level of activity.
Stay tuned for more interesting adventures.

I should have just married a doctor... :) just kidding

2008-06-17T19:43:00.003-05:00

Well, today has been filled with many hours of studying for the second part of my US licensing exam for Medicine. I am taking the test a week from yesterday and still have not brought myself to the intensity level necessary to prepare for the test, much less do well. This thing is a beast! 9 hours, and by the end I can pretty much guarantee to be seeing double.. Hope all of you are fairing better than me!

Malinda's Wedding

2008-06-16T12:55:00.000-05:00

June 7, 2008 proved to be the perfect setting for the marriage of Malinda Burkhart and Del Harris. Prior to that week I had worn my TB mask to help Malinda, my best friend, pack up her apartment to move to Knoxville. It was with both excitement and sadness that I did so, since this meant she would no longer live close.

Following the move, I drove to Knoxville to help with the wedding preparations. Anju, another friend from medical school, was my gracious host. We did everything from paint signs to set up chairs and tables, to decorate the tables for the reception. In the end, the day could not have been more perfect. The heat broke and the rain stayed away. The result was one of the most beautiful weddings I have ever been apart of. Upon seeing Del's face when Malinda came toward him, everyone in attendance knew that "At last" she had come home.

Del and Malinda had dated since college, and their courtship was fast approaching 7 years, the majority of which had been long distance. Del hardly ever complained about his long trips to visit her, or his "chores" upon arriving (hanging fans, frames, etc) He patiently waited for her and supported her dreams. The look on his face said it all when she finally moved home. He was gitty, and moved! I love to watch the groom, especially when it is the love of my best friend's life! His reaction was everything one could have hoped for.

Prior to the wedding, the bridesmaids gathered for a round of toasts and champagne from a can! (classy) What a disaster... we were all crying, especially me. I don't know why but wedding's really get to me. I was unable to appropriately toast my friend, for fear that my mascarra was not actually as waterproof as the packaged maintained.

Blake was in charge of parking the cars/driving the golf carts, which I think he did more of than park the cars. He loved flirting with the little old ladys and going as fast as possible up and down the hill.

Over all the day was a complete success, with much fun and much dancing. The flower girl was particularly drawn to me, for reasons I will never understand, telling her daddy she wanted to go dance with the blue girl. She danced with the blue girl alright, and added to my sweat problem that quickly got out of control. FYI blue dresses show wetness well!